View source for Justin's Letters, late 1998 / early 1999

Altclair is Naomi's campaign, set at the college of Altclair, which is somewhere in Minnesota (not Missouri). Think Pamela Dean's Tam Lin or GURPS Illuminati IOU. Other source material (that Naomi's not familiar with) might include Elizabeth Hand's Waking the Moon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and most of Charles de Lint. Players are me (Justin Thorne), Josh (Michael Conaway), and Manny (Jim Gaffney).

From the Desk of Justin Thorne

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Dear Mom,

Here's the long letter I promised you. It's probably going to contain stuff I probably have no business telling anyone, but I did say I'd give you a full explanation. So either burn this or keep it locked safely away when you're done reading it. I vote for option #1.

Dramatis Personae

*Professor David Corbet, a philosophy professor and swordfighter/fencer
*Jennifer Corbet, his wife
*Michelle Corbet, their child, apparently, but really the child of Jennifer and
*Michael Conaway, one of my firends, fences, history major
*Jim Gaffney, Michael's roommate
*Delilah Morgan, Michael's girlfriend. Possibly also Jim's girlfriend. English major.
*Helen Abernathy, Delilah's roommate, Anthropology major
*Rashid Ali, my roommate. Yes, this is the Palestinian chemistry major from Jordan. I try not to think about that. He's really a nice guy. (1)
*Justin Thorne - I hope I don't have to tell you who -I- am.
*Annmarie Browning, a ghost. You can read about her in my gazette - I'll stick a copy in with this letter. (2)
*Jido, 8 year old Mongolian child adopted by David and Jennifer.
*The Three Elder Mages
**Mary Moore, Michael's aunt from the UK, mage. Dislikes
**Iris Monequin, Jennifer's teacher, mage who can change people to toads (like me, so please keep this safe!), French
**Ash Wednesday, more powerful than either, lives in Canada, about an hour off campus. Doesn't have a phone.
*Others:
**Mr. and Mrs. Conaway, Michael's parents. They live about 3 miles off campus.
**Cat Gaffney, Jim's sister. We want to get her a scholarship to come to Altclair.

-- -- --

Where to begin? I guess I should probably start with some stuff that happened Fall quarter. I probably should have told you a lot of this earlier, but I'm telling you now. This isn't going to be an easy letter to write, and it may be somewhat painful to read. I apologize for that.

I think it all started with Michael. Most things have, so far. He wanted to see me about making a metal scabbard for a sword that was misbehaving. It was a fencing sabre, not a combat blade, that was cutting its way out of a scabbard and it had already cut him. Mind you, the blade does not have either an edge or a point.

It was also trying to get somewhere, specifically my room. Now, at this point, you're probably thinking what I was thinking. Right -- Michael's sword was trying to get to my sword. (3)

I took both swords down to the forge, which is in the tunnels below the theater, and Michael got his sabre to give us yes/no answers by tugging him left or right. It had been talking to my sword, somehow, and wanted to know what blood tasted like. Fortunately, it doesn't like the taste of blood. But it's fallen in love with my sword. Excuse me - I am very carefully not thinking about this. (4)

We kept them in the same box for a while, but they're apparently content now with periodical visits. I guess the honeymoon's over or something. Anyway, this led to Michael telling me some things about himself and me introducing him to Annmarie.

Now, Micahel is a mage. I'm not - I'm a maker. I'm not entirely sure how hard and fast this distinction is, as he made a wonderful curtain, but that's getting off track. All of this prelude -is- actually relevant.

Michael was in touch with two mages, his aunt Mary and Ash. He drove up to talk to Ash about a lot of things, one of which was me and my sword. Ash got in touch with his colleague Iris, who agreed to send her student to America. And that is how Jennifer Corbet arrived at Altclair.

Jennifer, I was told, was a sensitive, although she did not work magic herself. She went to the forge to examine the swords, and I told her the history of mine. (5) I've told rather a lot of people this, and I apologize if I'm telling tales out of school (or in school, as it were), but in each case, I believe that it was necessary.

Michael's saber is, more or less, harmless, I think. Or at least, more harmless than mine. Mine is not homicidal, but it is a working blade, not a show blade, and it will defend me if I feel endangered. I've been thinking about that, and I have no answer - I was certainly startled that night, but I would not have said that I felt endangered. In any case, if I feel the need for it, Jennifer says, the sword will become available, even if it is locked in the box. I guess the box will wind up open.

I suppose that means that I haven't felt threatened, even in Outer Mongolis, since the sword has stayed in its box. I also understand that the sword is unlikely to hurt me.

Now, I'm not going into the story of Outer Mongolia in the 13th Century here. You have most of the basics, and I'll tell you more on the phone if you like.

For now, points important to the rest of this:

*Jim, Michael, Jennifer, David, Rashid, and I went back to rescue Delilah
*We did not use the Classics time machine (6)
*I told Jim, Rashid, and Helen about the sword, since I was bringing it with me.
*We learned about where Delilah was by using my carpet.

This brings us to another digression, I am afraid, but a necessary one. After getting tired of having to figure out which yes/no question to ask Michael's sword (mine isn't communicative), I decided to make a ouija-board like carpet. Jennifer said to make sure I was in a good mood before making it, so I waited until after midterms. Anyway, it works - the wand points toward the correct answer, although you can drop it or get off the carpet. And it only gives the truth as the person on the carpet knows or believes it. (7)

Okay, I think we can finally skip to the middle of intersession. We will, however, have a flashback soon.

David and Jennifer have a house on campus. They were living there with Michelle and Jido. Delilah was staying there as well, catching up on her work. Rashid and I made arrangements to roomsit at one of the frat houses, and I was cadging half of my meals at David and Jennifer's. David invited me to stay, but I figured that they had a pretty full house already. Maybe I could have done something if I'd taken him up on the offer. I don't know.

I'd been taking lessons in swordfighting from David, trying to learn how to defend myself without attacking. When he didn't show up one day, I didn't assume anything was wrong. No one was at the house when I came by for dinner, but again, I figured they were enjoying an evening in town. It turns out I was completely wrong.

Michelle, the baby, had died the night before. It was a crib death, which is not pleasant to watch. Yes, I will explain that sentence.

First, however, I'm going to insert that flashback. The setting is Oxford. The time is three years ago. Young Michael Conaway is meeting Professor David Corbet and his lovely, lonely wife, Jennifer.

I think you get the picture. Michelle, of course, was Michael's child, and Jennifer and David both knew it. And David knew that Jennifer was in America at Ash's request. This meant, by the by, that David had to give up a nice job at Oxford because his wife wanted to go to America to be the eyes an ears of a Canadian Mage. And on the new campus, where David managed to find a job, was the man with whom his wife had been having an affair and by wom she had conceived a child.

I knew none of this then, but the timing had me concerned. I wondered if there could be any connection between Michelle's death and the story of how Jido got here. So I asked Jennifer if there was any sense of magic, making up an excuse for the question that had to do with a project I'm planning anyway. She said there wasn't, which, as it turned out, was not quite true, although I didn't know that then.(8)

Michael and David were getting on each other's nerves, and Michael had been thinking about visiting Ash to learn the truth about Michelle's death. This sounded like a good idea to me, so I suggested we go right then. So, Michael, Delilah, and I drove to see Ash.

Ash is a remarkable man. He is probably the most powerful Mage I know, maybe the most powerful one there is. He's been a pacifist since World War II, which did not make him popular among his peers. He's also a wonderful gardener.

There was a pine tree visiting him, or at least that's how he put it, and we decorated this with some wonderful ornaments. (9) Then he took Michael inside to learn the truth, while I built a snow fort. It was a wonderful fort, and Delilah proceeded to demolish it - and me. I'm too used to having allies providing covering fire.

Ash and Michael came back and all they'd say was that it was murder, and we went inside for the night. The next day, I made breakfast and a snowman. The pine tree helped. Then, I picked up a branch from the ground and started whittling. Before long, I had a half completed spear and Michael scared the living daylights out of me by - well, he didn't sneak up on me, he said. He'd been sitting there for some time before talking to me, but it felt like he'd snuck up, so I yelled at him never to do that again. Ash took the spear and convinced it that it really wanted to be a wall decoration. (10) I showed him the sword, locked it back in the trunk of Michael's car, put my pocket knife away, and thus disarmed, demanded the whole story.

As you may have guessed, I was told that David had killed Michelle, deliberately turning her face down and pulling the blanket up. I was also told about her parentage and that David had, apparently, made a point of telling Michael that he'd been the last person to see Michelle alive.

It was an interesting drive home. Michael brooded. I drove, filling the silence with somewhat absurd but quite serious plans to kill David.

You can calm down, mostly. Yes, I did seriously consider coldbloodedly running my sword through the man on the grounds that I've had more practice in it than Michael does. (11) But once we came back to Altclair, I came partly to my senses and made sure to stay the hell away from him. I also got Michael to promise me not to do anything drastic without telling me first, thought that was all I could get him to promise. Delilah told me to stay away from him, fearing, with some justification, that I'd be a bad influence.

I went to see Rashid to tell him the whole story over a whiskey. Well, five or six whiskeys. I don't know if you'll be horrified, amused, resigned, or relieved to read that you son has finally gotten stinking drunk. (12)

Rashid told me what Michael told me, and what others told me after, that this was none of my concern. (Actually, what Michael said was, "This isn't your war.") I decided to ignore this, although I couldn't ignore my first hangover the next day. Since Delilah had said I could bring Rashid, Jim, and Helen up to date, (13) I called Helen who told me what to do about the hangover. To give you some idea of my state of mind, I called Michael who told me to climb up the fireescape to the third floor of his dorm, go in by the window, and get asprin from there, and it struck me as a perfectly sensible idea. Then again, as Jim said when I called him later, one can do anything with a hangover that one can do without; it just hurts a lot more.

Jim was aware about Michelle's death and parentage, but not the latest twist. He was a lot more sensible than I was, and he pointed out that we didn't have hard evidence that what Michael saw was what he said he saw. (14)

I thought about that over the next couple of days, which were, quite frankly, hell. Normally, you know I'd just work on a project. But I'd been told that it was dangerous to work on projects when I'm in a foul mood. So I stayed away from the forge after accidentally making a dagger (quickly shipped to Ash), which made my mood even fouler, which turned into a nasty spiral. I read to Annmarie. I climed up and down fireescapes. I tried to climb the walls.

Helen came back to the campus on the 31st and peeled me off the walls, setting me to painting them instead. Delilah showed up and apologized, since Jim had talked to her. I told her that I needed more certainty about what happened because otherwise, I'd keep Michael from doing anything to David.

By now, Mary had talked to Michael and Delilah talked to her, and she came to the forge to talk to me. I, like a fool, showed my hand and told her where I stood. She made it clear that if I were determined to get in the way, she, Iris, and Ash would make sure I couldn't interfere. Nothing fatal, I'm sure, and I doubt they'd do anything that was even painful to anything except my dignity, which is probably long gone anyway.

I wanted to be convinced, or maybe I just didn't want to be the magical equivalent of locked in my room, and Mary was willing to drive me to Ash where they both explained the technque behind the spell Ash created which Michael used, and both of them and Iris answered questions on my carpet. (15)

As I understand it, the spell allows one to get answers one is entitled to, and Michael was entitled to know the truth about his daughter's death. I tried to find out about a certain night which I should have the right to know the truth about, at least where my motives were concerned, but I did not get any results, perhaps because I am a maker, not a mage. (16) Still, Ash made a comment about photography which may prove useful. The prevailing theory among the mages is that, however foul my mood, the only negative effect of my taking copious photographs is that I won't like what I see and the pictures will be very disturbing. (17)

I came away from Ash's pretty much convinced that such evidence as there was indicated that David had killed the baby. First, all three mages agreed that the spell worked basically the way I indicated above. Second, Mary and Iris agreed on the major facts, and they don't get along. This is not, I admit, proof, but it is indicative. Third, I asked a question that Jim askd of me: Is the vision that Michael saw some kind of test, like the scene of Luke in the tree from _The Empire Strikes Back_? All three answered the same way: Any mage who did that would never be allowed to have another student. Fourth, Mary did not, in fact, lock me in my room; she merely indicated that she was prepared to do so. Fifth, Ash told me that he had the power to cock my carpet, and he did not need to do this. These two could have been utter deviousness, but I doubt it's worth anyone's effort to be so devious where I am concerned. Sixth, I asked Ash a question which he refused to answer on the grounds that he did -not- wish to set my mind at ease about David if it meant - as we both knew that it would - that I would aid or condone an attempt to harm him. Ash was also prepared to keep me from intervening in such an attempt on the parts of Michael and Jennifer, and answering my question would have made progress in that direction. The ethics involved are fairly complex and it boils down to prizing Jennifer's mental health over David's physical health, and David's physical health over Justin Thorne's certainty.

Now, I'm afraid we need yet another digression which I hadn't reckoned on. I've discovered that there is an entire school of postal mages, and I decided to write to introduce myself to them. They became curious and took a copy of my gazette, which startled me, but I can deal with it, assuming no one else minds. (18) I do hope that they don't read this letter - that's why I addressed the letter as I did. If they do, I must rely on their sense of honor and hope that they will be kind enough to leave in peace a man who has been hurt too much already. I also hope that they leave the other parties mentioned in this letter in peace, unless the need arises, particularly as I could get into serious trouble for having written any of this anyway. (19)

But I did promise you this letter and by the time I learned of the risk, I'd already written up to about point four at the top of this page, and after a lot of thought on the subject, I came to the conclusion that having started this, I'd better finish it, so that the full story is known. (20)

Now, let's go back to New Year's Eve, about 9pm. I was driving Michael's car, while Ash, Mary, and Iris were in another. I was about as certain as I figured one could be in an imperfect world that David had killed Michael's child, so I made a couple of decisions.

The -second- thing I did was to call you from a pay phone so that if the Three Elder Mages did lock me up for my own good, someone would know where I was. (21) The first thing I did was to buy a pack of condoms from Walgrens.

I don't think it's what you're thinking. I bought them not to satisfy the obvious urges a college student feels, bu as a component for a voodoo doll. I intended to make sure that David's line ended with him. I intended to make sure that he never had another child. Well, perhaps I should say, that he never had a child of his own.

In fairness to myself, I will add that I intended to ask Michael and Jennifer for permission first, and to undo the spell if they asked me to - at least, I hope I would have.

I also intended to cancel the plan if it turned out that Jennifer was pregnant with David's child, as I had no wish to cause a miscarriage. It occurs to me now that I did not give any consideration of the possibility that another woman might be pregnant with his child. I certainly should have thought of this, although I do not believe that David was ever unfaithful to his wife.

I then drove back to Altclair, where I discovered Michael had decided to throw a party at the forge. He invited me to join in the festivities, and I traded him the car keys for a streamer. (22) I did check with him, as I had already checked with the Walgrens clerk, that I had purchased a brand of condoms that was reasonably effective as a contraceptive. (23)

Helen, Annmarie, Delilah, Rashid, and the Elder Mages were at the party. We were joined by David, Jennifer, and Jido, who proceeded to paint my face. Yes, the paint is off now - thanks for the advice. (24)

David must have known something was wrong. We either stared at him or pointedly avoided him - I dropped my paintbrush when I saw him. I picked it up with some, I am sure utterly unconvincing, excuse.

Iris bought wine and wiskey. The clock struck the first stroke of midnight - and then stopped. I went out to the bell tower, discovering that the gears were inexplicably (to me, at least) rusted in place, and immobile.

I returned to the theater, spooked, feeling that this was weird even for Altclair. At least, I -hope- it is weird even for Altclair. Please tell me it is, because it got even weirder. (25) Jim had arrived at the party.

Jim, mere seconds ago, had been at the Hard Rock Cafe in Boston, with his sister Cat. He went to the men's room, opened the door, saw Nothingness, climbed out the window, and found himself at the forge. As it turns out, Michael, who has something of a knack for transportation magic, although it is far from the only thing he can do, pulled him there with magic, without consciously realizing he'd done it. He was also partly responsible for stopping time in its tracks. He wanted the mess finished, you see, and he'd promised to wait until Jim got back.

I think Jim forgave him, more or less. Then, Michael decided Jido should fall asleep, and made it happen, again, without realizing he'd done it. Well, there we were. And Michael decided it was time to show us all, including David, what he'd seen. I'd planned to ask him to show me, though Mary warned me he was likely to insert the information in my head and make me watch the whole thing, start to finish. Guess I'm a glutton for punishment. Although I admit I am curious to test both our limits - thought that might not be wise just yet. Well, I certainly don't plan to experiment in that direction this quarter.

Michael didn't do mind magic, though; he just borrowed a mirror from me and projected the image. That reminds me, I should make sure the mirror is all right. It did show what he had seen, all of it - although Michael was merciful enough to speed up the part where Michelle suffocated. When asked, David confirmed that what he had seen was what happened. I ripped out some of his hair. You know, just grab and yank, like a schoolchild, although somewhat less innocently. I'm not sure if he \O\thought w\o\ I don't know how to finish that thought. I'm relatively sure he noticed, but it was rather beside the point.

Depending on how you count these things, and whether I am correct, there were two, maybe three folks mundanely armed and six magically armed. Okay, so my weapons were a few strands of hair and a pack of condoms, but I believe that it might as well have been an only slightly disassembled gun. (26) I stuck the hair in a container, while Michael asked David why.

He said that he didn't know, that there'd been an arguement, but he didn't remember about what, that he'd gone upstairs after he turned Michelle over and had done his damndest to think of nothing, that he hadn't been holding up well - all, you understand, delivered very understated, almost no inflection. Inevitably Jim suggested the carpet, on the grounds that it could hardly leave us knowing less than we knew. It confirmed that David didn't know why he'd killed the child, and we were at something of a loss.

At this point, Sherlock Holmes masquerading as Mary Moore put the pieces together and explained it, more or less, with the aid of Jennifer and the carpet. (27) I'm a bit hazy about precise details, but what we learned, never mind the order, is that Jennifer has the potential to be a very powerful mage, and she felt trapped in an undesireable marriage. The night Michelle died, she wished -very- hard that David would do something to justify her leaving him. She'd also helped Michael stop time, also unconscious of all of this, because she wanted it to be over, too. When we asked her questions on the carpet, the wand was all over the place because she was both very confused and too strong for the carpet. Mary says she should have realized what had happened since Iris would not take a student of low potential and David's actions had been utterly out of character. (28)

Frankly, I can't blame Iris for this. How do you tell a student that she might - or might not ever - manifest powerful magic in utterly unforseeable circumstances? (29) Michael blamed David of course - it was easier for him than blaming Jennifer - saying that she may have supplied the force, but he chose the direction. I do not believe that his analysis is correct. I'd like to hate Jennifer, but I am not entitled to cast that stone.

Once the truth in all its ugliness had come out into the open, time started, and we all got a glass of champaign. I had absolutely no desire to drink it, but Mary informed me that the way to accomplish this was to raise the glass to my lips and set it down untasted. (Just as well - the sponge-under-the-chin and pour-it-down-the-sleeves options would have been absurd.) (30)

After that, David and Michael proceeded to get drunk. Jennifer, understandably, proceeded to get hysterical. Ash proceeded to keep truce between Mary and Iris. And fallout proceeded to happen.

Delilah, Jim, Michael, Mary, Jennifer, and Jido went to Michael's folks' place and Jim arranged for his sister Cat to bring his luggage to him. (We simply must have her at Altclair - she'll fit right in and she Knows Too Much to - that's a joke, but you know, if her reactions parallel mine at all, now she's tasted the place, nothing else will do. You may want to frame this part of the letter: You were right. Thanks.) I made sure David got home, figuring I couldn't trust myself around Jennifer, if only because sooner or later I'd say something that would make Michael or Jim decide I'd really gone too far, and no one else seemed at all interested in David.

Ash and Iris went back to Ash's, I guess. Helen took the matress by the forge (which is back in storage (31)) while Rashid went back to the frat house. I set my alarm and got up before David did, getting together all the post-hangover materials I'd learned about from Jim and Helen - B12, asprin, orange juice, and toast. Are there any more I should know about?

David chased me out once he was well enough to stand, which was after I'd made breakfast but before I did the dishes. I did remember to keep my mouth shut, which is probably some kind of first. (32) Before I left, I gave him back his hair. I also gave him the condoms and told him to keep them both out of my reach. Then I gave him some of my hair.

I called the Conaways to make sure everyone had gotten there safely (33), tracked down Rashid for the keys to my room at the frat house, which I'd given to Jim under the mistaken impression that he'd be staying there, and invited anyone sober and un-hungover to make snow angels. This wound up being me, Helen, Rashid, Jim, and Jido. Well, Rashid just watched. He made his very first New Year's Resolution: Never to be surprised by anything we do. I intend to make him break it next quarter.

We headed over to the Conaways' after I confirmed that David was well enough to tell me to go to hell - don't get the wrong idea. I told him I wanted to hear it so I'd know he was doing all right - and gave him a note explaining the condoms and the hair. I have no idea if he even read it, which is probably just as well.

Mr. Conaway let us in and pointed out Jennifer's room, and didn't say a word about the paint on my face. I had planned to stay away from Jennifer until I came to my senses, at least where she was concerned, but Jim told me she'd been trying to wish herself dead, so I figured I should probably talk to her after all. I agreed that Jim should talk to her first, as he's better at interpersonal skills than I am, and told him to let me know if she still needed me when he was done, i.e., if she were still suicidal.

Michael was keeping an eye on her and he chased us away. I have no idea what that was all about and Jim looked pretty confused, so I don't think I was being especially clueless. (34) We went back downstairs, and I got everyone to work on cooking dinner. (35) During this time, Michael came down, and Jim went up. By the time we'd gotten dinner done and I'd brought the trays up for Jim and Jennifer, he'd worked his own kind of magic. I don't know what he said to her, but she came down and made sure to stay in company, which is a pretty good sign. Jim doesn't know how he did it either, of course - performance flow. (36) Having seen clear evidence of talent - this man did a fine acting job when he barely understood the language! - I am doing my best to coopt him into acting.

Jim, Helen, and I went back to campus, and we went to check up on David. He didn't answer the door and the answering machine had been detached. Fearing the worst, we broke in. We went through the house, I trying to go first into all the rooms, but no one was home. (37) This calmed us a little.

We put our heads together to discuss the ethics of my using a compass I'd modified plus the hair I'd returned to make sure that David was alive, and decided that we'd risk being ethically wrong over risking a man's life. The compass pointed east, and we found out that David had packed some clothes and things, so we guessed he'd gone back to England. Although we didn't know for sure, this turned out to be the case. I hope that he can get his job at Oxford back, if that's what he wants. Mary says that she'll see what she can do, but meddling in academic politics is, at best, uncertain.

Jim and I went back to the frat house, where I proceeded to drink a number of purely imaginary beers, since neither of us would lower ourselves to drink the real thing. I told him what I'd planned to do to David, and he gave me a proper chewing out. Then we agreed that, in general, killing people is a bad idea. This is not a hard and fast rule, but it's a good guideline. Helen agrees that cockaroaches don't count as people, but she says that puppies and ponies do.

After that, it was January 2 and folks came back to campus. The dorms were re-opened, and I told Donna, the RA of our wing, to keep an eye on Michael, explaining that he was a friend of the Corbets', and was taking the death of their child and the subsequent breakup very hard. She's working on something to do with alternate realities, and I'm wondering if I should help her out or if that would be unwise. (38) I talked to Jennifer, giving her a Justin's-eye view of the fun stuff she has to look forward to, and leaving her with groceries that I'd planned to use to repay the Conaways, but Michael wouldn't take them. (39) David's been the perfect English gentleman about the break-up, naturally, leaving Jennifer everything he has in the states. So long as she can get a cheaper place to live she'll be fine. I admit I thought of sending her and Jido to you, but I did come to my senses. Besides, she wants to take some classes here, at least as an auditor. (40)

Oh, and I promised her I wouldn't hover and told Mary to tell Iris to turn me into a toad if I break that promise, so if you see something hopping around the house, don't throw it into the stewpot - it might be me!

A few more loose ends to cover and I'll sign off. Michael did something incredibly stupid when he ought to have known better. He decided to make his car go 300 miles an hour, then had to stop it on a dime. Both he and Delilah were in it at the time. Fortunately, both survived with only minor injuries.

I did a somewhat pathetic job of yelling at Michael, as my performance was marred by his rather more effective judo throw when I tried to grab him and shake some sense into him. Nothing injured, since I lost my dignity the first day of classes (well, voluntarily surrendered it, but that's another story)> I gather Mary did a better job on the yelling. It seems the majority of mages do something incredibly stupid - or wake up rather traumatically - early on, and in that respect, Michael was lucky. But I hope you will understand why I decided to tell him and Delilah about the sword.

I burned my hair and David's, as well as a sketch I made as a joke and got yelled at for making. Please don't be too angry - I drew a picture of myself impaled on a sword - not mine. No harm came of it, and the picture has been burned. But I gather that it is at least theoretically possible that something could have happened, particularly if someone else got ahold of it. (41)

I did not burn the condoms, but I gave them to Jim. I never want to see that particular box. (42)

On, I hope, to more pleasant news. I am directing the tenth week play this quarter - Wait Until Dark. Daniel agreed to be my AD (43), and he's already chewed me out for trying to design + build the sets as well as direct. I tore everything down, and it was probably good for me.

Ash returned the spear which is utterly convinced it is a decoration. He says it should make a good stage prop. I asked if I'd know if for some reason it got un-convinced. He says he'll know.

Michael and Jennifer are taking an extra-curricular off-campus not-for-credit course in controlling their power. I am attempting to learn to deal with mine, with, I hope, some success. Ash says that makers are rare, but he'll try to put me in touch with one. Even then, he cautioned me that another maker can't exactly teach me the craft; he - or she - can only provide some helpful tips.

I'm taking Arabic, Math, Stagecraft, + Philosophy this quarter. For the last, I'll try to focus on eithics. Professor Macon promised me a supplemental reading list. (44)

My sword and I are now speaking to each other. (45)

Ash has a remarkable summer garden. An outdoor summer garden. Remind me to tell you more about him and his ability to communicate with the natural world. Yes, I realize that this is unfairly tantalizing, but I'd like you to get this letter before midterms. We'll be starting auditions on Tuesday and Daniel's promised to handle Jim's audition for me so I don't have to pretend more objectivity than we both know I'm capapble of. Let me know if you can make the play, and, if so, which performance you want tickets for. (46)

Love,
Justin

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January 1, 1999

Professor Corbet -

I'll leave this when I come to check up on you, assuming you're well enough to tell me to go away. It's just a quick explanation of the hair. I wanted it to make sure you didn't have another child. \O\At the moment\o\ Anyway, you've got it back, plus some of mine. I know you're not a mage, but I think we both know that you can find someone who'll use it if you have a mind to do so.

I'd planned to stay out of everything otherwise and I'll try to keep to that resolution although I didn't have much luck with the one I made about the lists. Still, if I get too obnoxious, I left a 2 by 4 for Daniel at the forge - feel free to apply it as necessary to the back of my skull.

Under the circumstances, I think it's just as well I'm taking the Philosophy sequence this year, as I clearly need to think more about ethics. As you know, I'm signed up for your section, and I'm selfish enough to hope that you will still be teaching it and that you will agree to allow me to remain in \O\that secti\o\ your section. However, if you have other wishes, I will honor them.

Justin

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(1) Rashid offered to supply the guns for the jaunt to 13th century Mongolia.

Justin: Oh God. You -are- a terrorist. (buries his face in his hands)

He did wonder if he shouldn't warn someone, but as Jim pointed out, all Rashid had done was offer to get weapons for folks like Justin.

(2) She's the ghost in the Theater Building.

(3) This was amusing. Michael knocked while Justin was nervous about his own sword. He wouldn't let Michael in until he'd locked it in a special box and duct-taped the box to the underside of the mattress. When he figured out where Michael's sword was trying to go, he made Michael wait outside his room while he retrieved the box and hid behind the door as Michael opened it, hoping he was wrong.

Justin's sword is the one he made himself, and he accidentally killed his stepfather with it. At least, he thinks it was an accident. The police confiscated it, but returned it without a word the next day.

(4) Justin's wrong about this. The swords are just friends.

(5) Justin made the sword himself and accidentally killed his stepfather with it.

(6) They took the train called The City of New Orleans, which seems to go anywhere, including alternate universes. It likes Michael, and he wasn't charged for the ride.

(7) In this case, the carpet could be used to find Delilah because she has a telepathic link with Michael, so his subconscious knew where he was. Jennifer was able to hypnotize him to get in touch with Delilah.

(8) Jennifer's magic caused or helped to cause Michelle's death, and she wasn't letting herself realize this. If no one had done anything, she would have "realized" that David had killed Michelle.

(9) Justin waved to the pine tree. It waved back. Justin sat down in the snow out of surprise. He later did something similar when he saw Ash's summer garden.

(10) Justin feels a bit guilty about this. It's sort of a betrayal of the weapon which wasn't doing anything wrong.

(11) Michael did not know exactly what Justin had done at that time, but he had figured out that Justin had probably killed someone with his sword. Michael wondered if it had been a critic. When Justin tried to explain that Michael should leave the killing to him (or something - no one was terribly coherent at that point), Michael said, "I know you've gotten away with it once."

(12) Miranda, Justin's mother, assumed that this was just the first time Justin admitted to getting drunk, but as he told her on the phone, it really was the first time ever.

(13) Actually, Delilah said that they could be brought up to date, but she meant later, as in after Jennifer had been told. Justin didn't realize this, and he assumed that Jennifer would be told immediately, with the result that Jennifer was the last to find out what was going on.

(14) Manny says that Jim was being something of a moral coward, using the lack of certainty as an excuse not to do anything. Justin thinks of Jim as his moral touchstone, something that would embarrass Jim if he knew it. Jim was very shaken to learn about Michelle's death, saying, "Thank God she was baptized." he was horrified to learn that David had killed her.

(15) Mary was the first to make the obvious comment about being called onto the carpet.

(16) Justin was trying to find out why he had killed his stepfather, i.e., how much of an accident it was.

(17) This came up when Ash was suggesting that Justin write about his experiences in the third person, or try sketching or photography. Justin has since purchased a camera and several rolls of film.

(18) This is just the latest in a series of times Justin got in trouble by not keeping his mouth shut. The problem is that the version of the gazette the postal mages got is the one that had all the stuff not intended for wide distribution.

This included a reference, albeit a very oblique one, to Rashid's terrorist background. Justin apologized to him for that, but it taxed even Rashid's patience.

Rashid (never once raising his voice or varying his usual polite tone): Justin, meaning no offense, and recognizing that this comes from your being an excellent journalist, there are times when I could wish that you would learn to button it.

It also included some of Annmarie's secrets, but she didn't mind the postal mages learning about them, and it included the entire article on Daniel's longevity. Justin wasn't entirely honest with Daniel, claiming that he'd done an early version of the article on Daniel, subject to Daniel's approval (as opposed to letting all of his (Justin's) friends know the full story on Daniel as far as he knew it), but Daniel didn't seem to mind, perhaps because this was the first he'd heard of the postal mages. He even said that Justin could publish the article, but not until the end of the academic year, which would allow any fuss to die down over the summer.

The most serious offense concerned Delilah, however. She is very sensitive about her origin as a character in Michael's stories,. Michael told Justin about this early in Fall quarter, without Delilah's permission, swearing Justin to secrecy. Justin didn't tell Delilah that he knew, but kind of made it clear while trying to figure out a way to get Delilah's family back (if that's the proper way of putting it), and Delilah decided to blame Michael for this. Michael figured it was his fault, not Justin's, and noted for future reference that Justin can't keep a secret.

Justin then printed that unfortunate line about Delilah being from another universe in the version of the gazette intended to circulate just among his friends. Unfortunately, Jim told Justin to let Cat read that, and Cat immediately blurted out that part to Delilah, who was furious.

Justin printed out a new version for limited circulation (as opposed to the one circulating campus-wide), without the offending (and inaccurate) statement, and went around collecting the old version. He got everyone's, but couldn't find his own. Using his carpet, he figured out that the postal mages had it, even though he didn't mail it. (The carpet worked because Justin had all the information, and his subconscious put it together.) He apologized to Delilah, again. He also apologized to Jennifer, since this edition of the gazette revealed that Jido is a dragon. Justin is still alive because the postal mages don't generally do anything with the information they collect, and everyone knows this, if they know about the postal mages at all.

(19) Justin knows damn well that several of the parties mentioned in this letter would have objected to its being written if they knew he were writing it.

(20) This is partly Justin's rationalization, and partly the rationalization Naomi and I came up with so that I'd have an excuse for putting this in A&E. Justin wrote on the envelope "Personal Communique to My Mother". When she received the letter, she called Justin to tell him that the postal mages had written in the margins of his letter, explaining, rather embarrassed, that they didn't realize that this meant "Private", being unused to modern idioms, and they were very sorry. Justin sent them a brief note that folded into its own envelope:

To the Postal Mages:

The fault is mine, not yours. I apologize for any embarrassment I caused.

Sincerely,

Justin Thorne

(21) He left a message on his mother's answering machine, which is why he had to promise a full explanation by letter later.

(22) This is loosely based on a high school incident, where a mutual friend of Naomi and I called me up to inform me that there was going to be a Halloween party at my house and to ask me if I'd like to come. Fortunately, my mother was very understanding.

"The forge": Justin has a forge set up in one of the rooms under the Theater building at Altclair.

(23) Naomi said that, given how magic works in the game, the fact that Justin believes the condoms are effective against contraception will make them so.

(24) Jido painted a line straight down Justin's face, getting the teeth in the process.

(25) Miranda was unable to provide such assurance. She did point out that some folks got through Altclair without ever encountering High Weirdness, but Justin's already looking for it.

(26) Mundanely armed folks definitely included Michael and David, both of whom carry a sword. Rashid was probably armed as well: at one point, Jim and Justin realized that he was using his left hand to shake hands and hold his champagne glass, while his right hand was in his pocket. Rashid is from a culture where than is generally Not Done.

Once the ugly truth started coming out, Rashid positioned himself where he could, if necessary, get a clear shot at anyone in the room. When Justin realized this, Jennifer's role in the tragedy had been revealed, so Justin moved between Rashid and David, figuring that (a) Jim and Michael, at least, would look after Jennifer and (b) Justin didn't much care if Rashid hurt Jennifer at the time.

Afterwards, I made a mental note that Justin's self esteem is reasonably healthy, since he was essentially saying, "If you're going to hurt David, you'll have to hurt me first, and I don't think you're prepared to do that." Justin is deliberately leaving all of these details out of the letter because he doesn't want to go spreading information about Rashid, especially when the postal mages might read it. He is uncomfortable about Rashid's political leanings, but he likes Rashid.

Magically armed folks are Ashe, Mary, Iris, Jennifer, Michael, and Justin, who likely has an exaggerated idea of his own capacity.

(27) Jennifer was too strong for Justin's carpet, so he told her to drop the wand before she broke it or something.

(28) Josh and I talked about this Mary ex machina, which did not bother us during the session, but which we weren't sure was aesthetically pleasing. We figured it might have made more sense to have Iris explain what was going on, since she probably would have enjoyed boasting. This is likely a matter of taste.

As for the question of the PCs being forced to be spectators as someone else reveals the mystery, Josh pointed out that we did actually have all the clues we needed, and we didn't get it. The gm's within her right to provide the explanation under such circumstances.

Incidentally, this is an example of an impromptu onion plot. That is, Naomi originally simply planned to use David as the villain, but when she saw us getting ready to take some kind of drastic action, she decided to add another layer.

(29) What Justin doesn't realize is that for Jennifer's power to manifest, she had to be under tremendous stress, so what Iris was doing was taking Jennifer as a student, hoping that something so traumatic would happen to her that her talent would manifest.

(30) I figured that Justin might know about these tricks because of the theater background he shares with his mother. I learned about the sponge trick from one version of the story of the 12 dancing princesses. The down the sleeve trick was used in Gillian Bradshaw's In Winter's Shadow, the third of her novels about Arthur's nephew Gwalchmai (Gawain).

(31) The mattress is in storage, not the forge. Justin brought it to college with him and set it up in the tunnels under the theater building.

(32) Justin kept his mouth shut by biting the inside of his cheek when he was tempted to say anything. He's trying to find a less painful alternative.

(33) A bit of miscommunication here kept Justin unsure of where Jennifer was for a while.

(34) Michael and Delilah were taking advantage of their mindlink to have telepathic sex, and Jim had essentially walked in on this, although he didn't know that.

(35) Justin happily bossed everyone around, as food is also a kind of art.

Justin (asked if he needs help): Everything's under control.

Helen: Something's under control? Justin, that's the first time I've ever heard you say that!

(36) Jim lied to Justin. He told Jennifer about the time he'd gotten a woman pregnant and she'd had an abortion.

(37) Justin figured he'd better go first since he's seen a dead body before, and not just in a mirror vision.

(38) Actually, Justin can't help her. He finally realized she should talk to Michael about the train called The City of New Orleans, which can travel to alternate New Orleanses.

(39) This was loosely modeled on a conversation I had after a friend committed suicide. I was talking to a man who had been a cop, and he said that I wasn't going to get over what had happened. Oddly, I found this soothing to hear, perhaps because I was annoyed at constantly being asked if I were all right.

Jennifer knew about Justin's stepfather, so he figured he really should warn her about what happens when you've done something awful without meaning to. He started by giving her the groceries, explaining that he figured he should replenish what he'd used in cooking dinner for the Conaways, but -

Jennifer: You take too much on yourself.

Justin: Yes, that's something else we have in common.

Jennifer didn't like hearing that, but she was rather relieved that Justin didn't expect her to just get over what had happened, unlike everyone else.

She also said that Mary blamed her for the whole thing, but Justin learned that Mary was simply playing bad cop, giving Jennifer a speech about what happens when a mage lets her power get out of control, designed to scare her.

Justin (who's been hanging around Brits, like David and Mary, a bit too long): That's bloody cold. (pause) Please give me the same speech you gave Jennifer. All of it - I think I need to hear it.

(40) Justin suggested to Michael that since Ash wanted Jennifer to be his eyes on campus that he let her and Jido move in with him. Ash agreed, and Michael told Justin, who is pleased that he's managed to be of some use.

(41) Justin drew the picture of himself impaled on a sword as an attempt to lighten the mood and apologize to Delilah for letting Cat learn that she was not from this universe. Delilah yelled at him for drawing it, given that he's a maker.

Justin (ripping it up): Okay, it's gone. Sorry. I wasn't thinking.

Delilah: Tell you what. I'll forgive you if you let me paint that on your door: I wasn't thinking. --Justin.

Justin agreed. She painted "I wasn't thinking either" on the door to Michael and Jim's room, not bothering to sign that, as both of them had been boneheaded recently.

(42) Cat, who had no idea why Justin was doing this, used it as ammunition in an arguement with Jim, threatening to tell their parents that Jim not only swore like a sailor, but also that his friends seemed to think it was perfectly fine to give him condoms.

(43) AD = Assistant Director

(44) Asking Macon for supplemental reading means that he'll hold you accountable for doing it and knowing it all. Justin thinks this is fine. After all, if he didn't want to do the reading, he wouldn't have asked for it.

Macon's name originated when Naomi, asked what the philosophy professor's name was, told Josh, "Make one up."

(45) Via the carpet. Justin has named the sword Caliban, which may not have been diplomatic, since his mother is Miranda, but the sword likes the name.

(46) Miranda will catch the Saturday performance, and stay for the weekend and will likely drive Justin home after his finals. Justin is looking forward to this with mixed excitement and dread. This letter is the first long talk he's had with his mother since killing his stepfather. The phonecall that followed was interesting. It went well, but it also had several awkward spots where Justin brushed sensitive subjects somewhat roughly. He's decided that he was trying to put things back to where they were, and that he can't just do that, so he's likely to be doing an advance/retreat dance with his mother.

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Addendum as I post this: Justin's all of 16 or 17 at this point, having been skipped at least once. I think he did turn 21 during his senior year, and I'm fairly sure his birthday's in February. Yah, that would make him 16, which explains a fair bit.